Mental health is a frequently misunderstood topic:
Many people believe that mental health is predetermined — that you are essentially at the mercy of your genetics and brain chemistry.
Other people believe that it’s simply a matter of will power — this is exemplified by the “just think positive” mentality.
But the truth is in the messy middle:
Mental health is not a matter of fate or a single decision — it’s mostly a matter of habits.
In my work as a psychologist, the best way I’ve found to help people strengthen their mental health is to help them cultivate healthy habits, especially mental habits.
This doesn’t mean that other factors like your biology or social context don’t matter — they definitely do! But for most of us, the thing we have the most control over is the habits we choose to build and live by.
Here are four uncommon habits that will improve your mental health and resilience.
1. Be curious about your own mind.
Metacognition is the ability to observe and think about your own mind and how it works — and it’s a key ingredient for lasting mental health.
Most people act on autopilot, especially when strong emotions are involved:
You feel angry and immediately lash out — saying something sarcastic, slamming a door, or even just ruminating in your own mind about how terrible someone else is.
You feel anxious and immediately try to distract yourself with meaningless activities or you call a friend for reassurance.
You feel sad and immediately turn to alcohol or food to numb out the pain.
Not only does impulsiveness lead to bad decisions, but it prevents us from learning something new about ourselves.
If you always resort to sarcasm anytime you feel angry, for example, your vision of what anger is and what it means is quite limited. It’s just a bad feeling that leads to saying cruel things.