Passion can wither, fizzle, dissipate, and lose its charm after some months, years of dating, or marriage. But why let it wither away when there are ways to rebuild what is lost and set fire to your sex life? No matter how long you’ve been with your partner, intimacy in the bedroom is a common ground most relationships stand on.
Passionate sex is a tool that can mediate and balance every relationship. Lovemaking strengthens relationships, and pleasure with one’s partner can be attained. The lack of it is a reason most relationships fail, as there is no intense, passionate lovemaking to fuel the relationship or partners who suck at being passionate.
But don’t fret. You can learn what is passionate sex, how to make passionate love, and have them begging for more no matter the age or kind of relationship you share. You have no reason to be engaging in bad sex when you could have wild, passionate sex.
What is passionate sex?
It is not enough to want to have wild sex; you’d first need to figure out what is passionate sex.
Being passionate in bed isn’t exactly how it’s shown in movies; the aggressiveness, the ripping of clothes, the tossing on the bed, furniture creaking, and partners that moan so loud the man on the moon can hear them.
These things happen in the movies and not in real life.
It is less dramatic and more real but very much passionate. Then, what is passionate sex?
Psychologist Elaine Hatfield describes passionate love as “A state of intense longing for union with another.”
In order to understand what does passionate means, we must know its components. It involves very powerful and intense feelings, the type that makes you want to be in the sheets with them right now, all sweaty and hot.
It is that ache to be with them and in them that we tag as passionate or wild sex. It is filled with passion. It is an intense driving or overmastering feeling of conviction. It is also a strong liking or desire for or devotion to some activity, object, or concept and, in this case, a person.
To put what is passionate sex more plainly, we can say that passion is a sexual desire, which means it has to come with a lot of sexual desire and feelings.
But it is easy to confuse lust for passion in a relationship; lust is not always okay in a relationship. You need to be able to differentiate these two emotions if you want to achieve the passionate, loving sex you so desire.
Why is passionate sex important in a relationship? 5 reasons
Passionate sex can be important for a relationship for various reasons, as it contributes to the overall health and connection between partners. Here are five reasons why passionate sex is often considered important:
1. Emotional intimacy
Passionate love definition involves a deep emotional connection between partners. It goes beyond the physical act and allows individuals to express vulnerability, trust, and intimacy. Sharing such a profound experience fosters a stronger emotional bond, bringing partners closer together.
2. Stress relief
Sex, particularly passionate and intimate encounters, can act as a powerful stress reliever. Engaging in sexual activity releases endorphins and reduces cortisol levels, contributing to a sense of relaxation and well-being. This can help partners navigate the challenges of daily life with a more positive outlook.
3. Communication
Wondering what does passionate mean in a relationship?
Passionate sex often requires open communication about desires, boundaries, and preferences. Engaging in these conversations helps partners understand each other’s needs and fosters a healthy sexual relationship.
Clear communication in the bedroom can translate to better communication in other aspects of the relationship.
4. Connection and commitment
Regular, passionate sex can reinforce a sense of commitment and connection between partners. It serves as a unique way to express love and desire for each other, reinforcing the exclusivity and special nature of the relationship. This shared experience can contribute to a lasting and meaningful connection.
5. Physical health benefits
Engaging in a healthy sex life has been associated with various physical health benefits. It can improve cardiovascular health, boost the immune system, and contribute to overall well-being. Feeling physically good can positively impact one’s mood and energy levels, creating a positive cycle that extends beyond the bedroom.
It’s important to note that while passionate sex can contribute positively to a relationship, it is just one aspect of a multifaceted connection. Open communication, trust, shared values, and mutual respect are also crucial elements in maintaining a healthy and fulfilling relationship.
5 benefits of passionate sex in a relationship
Engaging in passionate sex can offer a range of benefits, both for individuals and for the relationship itself. Here are five potential benefits:
1. Stress reduction
Passionate sex triggers the release of endorphins, the body’s natural feel-good chemicals. These endorphins can act as a natural stress reliever, helping to reduce feelings of anxiety and promoting a sense of relaxation. Physical intimacy can provide a temporary escape from the pressures of daily life.
2. Improved mood
Sexual activity, especially when passionate and fulfilling, is associated with improved mood and a sense of happiness. The release of neurotransmitters like dopamine and oxytocin during sex contributes to feelings of pleasure, bonding, and emotional well-being.
3. Enhanced relationship satisfaction
Regular passionate sex is often linked to higher levels of relationship satisfaction. It fosters a deeper emotional connection and intimacy between partners, contributing to a sense of closeness and mutual understanding.
Feeling desired and connected in the bedroom can positively impact the overall quality of the relationship.
4. Physical health benefits
Beyond the immediate emotional and psychological benefits, engaging in regular, consensual sex has been associated with various physical health advantages. These include improved cardiovascular health, better immune function, and even pain relief, thanks to the release of endorphins.
5. Increased bonding and intimacy
Passionate sex involves a high level of emotional and physical intimacy. This kind of deep connection can strengthen the bond between partners. Sharing such an intimate experience fosters trust, vulnerability, and a sense of security within the relationship, leading to a more profound connection.
It’s essential to note that the benefits of passionate sex can vary from person to person, and not all individuals or couples may experience the same positive outcomes.
Additionally, a healthy and fulfilling sex life is just one aspect of a well-rounded and satisfying relationship, which should also include effective communication, shared values, and mutual respect.
Differences between passion and lust in a relationship
When they hear the word’ passion,’ most people think of a relationship between two lovers, under the sheets, bodies perfectly attuned to each other, having intense sex. When you then think of ‘lust,’ you find yourself thinking of negative desires, but lust is also okay in a relationship, sometimes.
Imagine how hot it would be to have your partner lusting after you even after a lot of time has gone by in your relationship. This lands us on the question, “Are lust and passion needed in a relationship, or are they not?
Lust and passion, though similar in emotions, are different in meanings.
For you to be able to differentiate and identify the emotions you feel, it is important to understand them carefully. Emotions are normal, even intense ones like anger, lust, jealousy, passion.
Let’s figure out how lust and passion vary:
Passion generally means an intense or strong liking for an activity, object, or concept, as earlier stated. We use the term to refer to objects, activities, and even people. Lust, on the other hand, is a strong desire for satisfaction.
Passion is intense enthusiasm and love and can even be dark, like anger, hatred, etc. Passion relates to intense feelings of sexual love, too.
For example, if we say one is a passionate lover, they are an enthusiastic partner, one who is excited about their partner and their pleasures with an intense devotion to the satisfaction of both partners.
Lust, on the other hand, borders on strong desires that need immediate fulfillment. Lust can be directed at someone, a concept, or an object.
If one acts out of lust in a relationship, most of the time, it is void of love and consideration of the other’s feelings. It also lacks the genuine intensity passion carries.
It is a selfish hunger that needs to be satisfied, and while sometimes you can lust over your partner, wanting them to satisfy your sexual cravings, lust is selfish, and selfishness doesn’t thrive in a relationship meant to be built on love.
Passion is an excitement for the partner where you think equally for yourself and your partner.
Lust is more of self-pleasure, while passion is less of one’s self and more of your partner. So, when it comes to passion vs. lust in a relationship – pick a side.
17 ways to make passionate and intense sex and lovemaking
Every day, the internet is flooded with questions on sex.
How to have passionate sex? How do I make love with passion? How do I restore the passion in our relationship? How do I please my partner? How do I become a passionate lover and lots more?
Different questions all seeking the same thing. Answers to questions and complaints are always asked and are important for most relationships to strive and stand the test of time.
As earlier said, the passionate kind of sex you see in the movies is not the same thing in real life, so do not set such expectations because you will only get disappointed.
Below are ways to keep fueling the passion in your relationship and have intense sex with your lover.
1. Learn how to love yourself
If you do not love yourself, you won’t be able to give it to someone. Needy people do not love themselves. They base their self-worth, security, and self-love on their partner and how he/she treats them.
If you demand sex just to feel good about yourself, you will end up sooner or later turning your partner off and ruining the chances of passionate sex and a relationship happening. Love yourself, value yourself, build your confidence, and how do you do this?
Choose yourself consciously every day, and treat yourself the way you would a good friend with respect and utmost care. Having passionate and hot sex isn’t a means of self-validation but a means of expressing the love you feel for your partner.
2. Have sex everywhere and anywhere
Most couples reserve sex for the bedrooms, and well, you know how boring that too could be, so get creative here and naughty. Take the sex to the living room, perform a striptease, and have wild sex on the couch.
Your hot tub could be the new bed for you and your partner. Don’t forget the kitchen counter or a strong table in your house, the swimming pool, or the lawn if you have that.
Changes in sex space will get you both aroused and keep the passion burning for a long time.
3. Be spontaneous
Spontaneity is a good way to fuel the passion in your sex life. Sometimes, sex gets boring just because you know that you need to or have to have sex.
Do not wait it out, looking for who can be bold enough to make the first move because this leads to basic sex, and that is always boring. Instead, include surprises and be spontaneous.
Sneak up on them while they cook, join in the shower and have steamy shower sex, and give a mind-blowing blow job in between a movie or a football match showing on TV. These things, though simple, spice up the sex and let you be spontaneous.
4. Connect with your partner on a deeper emotional level
Set aside time for your partner, for both of you to connect, to learn more about each other because every day is a new day to learn more about your partner and have fun with them too.
As the relationship grows with time, couples grow more comfortable with each other and experience what we call compassionate love.
If you no longer set time aside to enjoy each other’s company, if you skip out on connecting with your partner to learn, have fun, share, and grow together, you cannot have a passionate and intense sex life.
Create date nights or days, whichever works for you both. Connecting with your partner on a deeper emotional and vulnerable level is vital for not only the sexual but also emotional parts of your relationship.
5. The ambiance of your sex space matters
Use your five senses to ensure the ambiance of your bedroom or wherever it is used is top-notch.
First off, your partner would appreciate the efforts, which could lead to intense feelings and passionate and wild sex. Make sure that the place where you want to have sex is really sexy.
6. Try out new sex positions
Step away from the traditional roles and get creative about the positions you use. Read on positions and try out new sex positions as there are a lot of positions and not just the regular missionary.
Be open-minded because different sex positions will make the sex intense, and the excitement of trying new sex positions to boost your sex life could be fun, as we as humans love to explore.
You could try out the reverse cowgirl position, sit on the throne, and so many more sex positions you can learn and try out.
When you go to a place you’ve never been, you take your time to savor the place.
You feast your eyes on things you’ve not seen before, you sometimes get handsy, and overall, you are excited to be exploring new territories. This is exactly how you should treat your partner each time you want to have sex.
You could be surprised by the uncharted territories you haven’t explored, explore every inch of their body; use your tongue, make magic with your hands, you could even use toys if they like that, and get amazed by the pleasure spots you missed before or didn’t know about.
8. Get comfortable with your partner
Remember the awkwardness that comes with someone’s first sex? The shyness? The rushing to dress? The tension and strain because you are not comfortable?
This is the reason most people say, “My first time was bad.” The problem is in their uneasiness and discomfort, not maybe in the sex. And this can also apply to long-term relationships. If you are not as comfortable as you should be with your partner, then it would be like the first time all over again.
The best of such sex happens when we are with someone we are comfortable with. So, get yourself comfortable, put your partner at ease, get the room comfortable, and get rid of any sexual anxiety so you can experience the passionate sex you deserve.
9. Value your partner to build sexual safety
Sexual safety is a state in which the physical and psychological boundaries of individuals are maintained and respected.
You need to learn to value and love your partner to build a healthy, loving relationship, which in turn breeds the passion your relationship and sex life needs.
Open up yourselves, be vulnerable with your partner, and do not let fear stop you from creating the intimacy, relationship, and sex life you both deserve.
Once you know that you are important and valued by your partner, you can get comfortable and feel safe in the bedroom because you know that your partner respects you and you are valued.
You would, in turn, be more open to experimenting with your partner on your sexual cravings and vice versa. Your confidence in the relationship grows, and activeness in the bedroom is a result of activeness outside the sheets.
The mere thought that someone sees and accepts us just as we truly are is enough to grow the intimacy, and intimacy leads to a sex life and relationship filled with passion.
10. Get kinky and loud
Most times, we bite our lips to prevent the moans from escaping our lips and disturbing the neighbors.
You fear that your moans are like those in porn videos, too embarrassing, or maybe you are not comfortable enough with your partner or your own moans, but sex sounds have a positive effect on your partner. Let them know you enjoy whatever it is they are doing.
It doesn’t hurt to throw your head back sometimes and let out that moan for your partner, but if you find it difficult to moan, you could also learn how to make sex sounds and get kinky with your partner to boost the intensity of the sex you are having.
11. Break out of your routine rut and embrace newness
The reason most relationships suffer breakup is due to the lack of newness. They allow routine to wither away the passion, and this adversely affects their sex life.
You need to get rid of routine checks and ruts to have passionate sex with your partner, as your relationship will only flourish if you and your partner make conscious efforts to grow and learn in your relationship.
A boring relationship leads to boring sex, and boring sex leads to bad sex, which can kill a relationship. Never stop growing, learning, and changing because this way, there’s always a level of mystery, and that is where the newness lies.
12. Give oral sex a try
It would surprise you to know that some couples exclude oral sex from their sex life because oral sex is work, and putting in such extra effort is not for everyone. You do not even have to do it every day. Twice a week works to keep up the spice.
Learn how to pleasure your partner orally, get down and use your tongue, and encourage your partner to do the same.
13. Never loose focus from your partner
Do not have sex just for the purpose of orgasm and finishing off. Some people have sex like they do a chore, and it should never be this way if you want to have a passionate sex life.
Be mentally present as you are physically. Focus on both your partner’s and your own body along with what you are doing.
14. Know how to ask for sex
Most people expect their partner to know when they need or crave sex. The assumption that your partner knows what you want is a hoax and will bring issues to your relationship.
Want to learn how to be more passionate with your partner? Tell your partner that you are in the mood and ask them if they want to have sex, too.
You should also learn how to say no. Do not think that the fact that you want your partner is obvious. Until you learn how to ask for sex from your partner, you can end up feeling unhappy with your partner.
Also, on the days you do not want to have sex, instead of forcing yourself just to please your partner and regret it later or have your partner feel like they did something wrong, just learn how to say no to sex and your partner.
15. Love is the key to having a passionate sex life
Such sex is driven by a passionate relationship, and a passionate relationship is clouded by the aroma of love. Without love, the aforementioned cannot exist, and this makes love the seasoning of intense sex.
16. Communication is crucial
Open and honest communication is the foundation of a healthy sexual relationship. Discuss your desires, boundaries, and fantasies with your partner.
Create an environment where both of you feel comfortable expressing your needs and concerns. This not only enhances understanding but also fosters a deeper emotional connection, contributing to a more passionate sex life.
17. Prioritize emotional intimacy
While physical intimacy is crucial, emotional connection plays an equally vital role. Take time to understand your partner’s emotions, fears, and desires.
Engage in activities that strengthen your emotional bond, such as sharing experiences and dreams or simply spending quality time together. Emotional intimacy enhances the overall connection, translating into a more passionate and fulfilling sexual relationship.